It is difficult to describe the joy that I feel when somebody chooses to say 'Excuse me, please', rather than 'Coming through!' or remaining mute and simply making use of one's elbows aggressively on their way off of the London underground tube. I smile in delight and wonder if anybody else has witnessed this almost miraculous event, and wonder, too, if others share this delight.
Conversely, let me try to explain the disgust that I feel when the busy train pulls up at a platform, and a clump of people do not wait for those on the train to get off first. Where does this rudeness come from?! Not to mention the idiocy. Surely it's clear that stepping onto a busy train at the same time that others wish to get off, all within very limited space, is not conducive to comfort or efficiency?
But of course saying something to the rude offender means that some rules of etiquette have been breached, and one ironically becomes an equal offender of politeness. Traditionally, one who has noticed a social offence should remain quiet. This is where I am torn! What if these people genuinely don't understand! What if their parents never taught them standard manners! They could continue to go through life making a fool of themselves, and irritating others in the process. Surely it's our duty to speak out? "Fool, it is common decency and courtesy to remain to the side of the doorway of the tube/bus/shop until the traveller/shopper has exited the tube/bus/shop. Please refer to 'Debrett's A-Z of Modern Manners' for further information". Admittedly, I haven't read this book, but I presume such basics are included.
I would also guess that information about polite conversation with one who works in the public sector is included in this book. I suspect that the gentleman who works in the 'Assistance and Tickets' box at Finsbury Park missed this section.
"Hi, could you tell the best way to get to Blackhorse Road, please?"
"Bus 41."
Pause
"So will that take me directly to Blackhorse Road?"
"No, Tottenham Hale"
Longer pause, with encouraging motions with hands and eyes. Nothing.
"Okay great. So how do I get to Blackhorse Road?"
"Take the 41, then the 230."
"Thank you so much for your [helpful] assistance."
The first thing you may have noticed is the lack of hello from the man in the assistance box. He didn't smile either, but that's neither here nor there. The next thing that probably stood out is the abrupt manner with which he supplied the wrong information. Apologies - it wasn't strictly wrong, it was merely incomplete. But he didn't make any move to complete the information that I politely asked for.
I'm still baffled as to why he didn't wish to assist, when that appears to be part of his job description. Perhaps he was aware of pending strikes that the public was soon to experience - Tuesday 7th September. (Strikes in protest, I understand, of the job cuts soon to be made against those working in the tickets and assistance booths. Perhaps if they assisted...) Maybe he took an immediate dislike to me? Or perhaps he was shell-shocked at the bomb I dropped! The bomb of politeness! That's got to be it. He's been fighting a silent and possibly futile battle against the millions of people using the underground who seem to have forgotten their manners and the basic rules of etiquette that I thought everybody knew.
He must have been unlucky in missing the many lovelies to whom these things come naturally. I look forward to seeing and meeting more of them.
